When my syndicate editor told me a few clients had been asking, Don't you have anyone over there who can write something positive about Donald Trump?, I thought, well, that could be fun.
Once upon a time, a scantily clad lass padding down a beach might cause a riot -- at least of eyeballs eager to extend the sidelong glance.
Reflexively, I type "Dru" and The Drudge Report pops up. I hate myself for going there but as a columnist ever in search of the zeitgeist's ultimate wave, I am behooved.
No one would mistake Roger Ailes for a ladies man, at least not without a fistful of dollars -- or a garter belt.
Imitation may be the highest form of flattery, but plagiarism, not so much.
By now most Americans know the name of Dallas Police Chief David Brown -- and quite a few wouldn't mind seeing him play a larger national role. I hear Republicans are looking for a substitute nominee.
But of course Bill Clinton wants his wife to become president of the United States and make history as the nation's first female commander in chief.
Watching Hillary Clinton beaming sidewise on stage as Elizabeth Warren taunted Donald Trump brought the Wrigley twin ditty to mind: Double your pleasure, double your fun, with double good, double good, Doublemint gum.
If you turned on cable TV news Monday, chances are good that you caught Corey Lewandowski fibbing that he doesn't have a clue why Donald Trump fired him as his campaign manager. Of course he knows.
It was inevitable that we would one day seek ways to kill ourselves with society's blessing.