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If Animals Could Vote

September 7, 2016 - 7:00am

The animal kingdom will have lost one of its staunchest defenders when the Oval Office is abandoned by Barack Obama, who through a series of critical, administrative rulemakings has done more to protect animals than any other president in recent memory.

'The Blacks'

August 31, 2016 - 7:00am

When Donald Trump says he has a great relationship with "the Blacks," I wonder if he also gets along well with the Smiths. We know he's tight with the Whites.

The GOP's Trumpian Deflation

August 29, 2016 - 7:00am

Donald Trump. Would that it were unnecessary to mention his name except, say, as a Viagra pitchman.

Hillary's Heel

August 24, 2016 - 7:00am

When I wrote the headline "Hillary's heel," I was thinking of Achilles, not Bill, though the former president is usually within nipping range of his wife's pantsuit hem.

A Nice Column About Trump

August 23, 2016 - 7:00am

When my syndicate editor told me a few clients had been asking, Don't you have anyone over there who can write something positive about Donald Trump?, I thought, well, that could be fun.

Beach Burkini Bingo

August 18, 2016 - 7:00am

Once upon a time, a scantily clad lass padding down a beach might cause a riot -- at least of eyeballs eager to extend the sidelong glance.

Driven to Distraction

August 15, 2016 - 7:00am

Reflexively, I type "Dru" and The Drudge Report pops up. I hate myself for going there but as a columnist ever in search of the zeitgeist's ultimate wave, I am behooved.

Fox and Friends With Benefits

August 3, 2016 - 7:00am

No one would mistake Roger Ailes for a ladies man, at least not without a fistful of dollars -- or a garter belt.

You Know What They Say ...

July 20, 2016 - 7:00am

Imitation may be the highest form of flattery, but plagiarism, not so much.

Eye of the Beholder

July 13, 2016 - 7:00am

By now most Americans know the name of Dallas Police Chief David Brown -- and quite a few wouldn't mind seeing him play a larger national role. I hear Republicans are looking for a substitute nominee.

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