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Nancy Smith

Poor Charlie: What's a Guy Gotta Do?

June 25, 2016 - 6:00am

What a week for Charlie Crist. Try to imagine ... 

There was Charlie laying low in St. Petersburg, stretched out on his tanning bed, fingers crossed, staying out of trouble, fan at the ready. So positioned to end the win drought.

OK, so the prize wasn't the Senate. It wasn't even the Governor's Mansion. But CD 13, sanitized by the courts for a Democratic victory, was his ticket to get back to the limelight and into the Washington party circuit. He even had President Obama's endorsement.

(Now we come to the part like in the old war movies, when John Wayne hitches up his rifle and says, "I don't like it, Charlie, it's too quiet out there.") 

And sure enough. BAM. It happens again.

Along comes that dang-blasted, dream-spoiling, son-of-a-Cuban -- Marco Rubio.

It's no fair! He promised he wouldn't run for the Senate. He went back on his promise. What an Indian giver. Quick, Carole, call Donald Trump. Find out what I have to do to get rid of this guy.

I Beg to DifferWell, it's too late now. The damage is done.

Consider for a moment how many chapters of failure Charlie's written ever since Marco came on the scene.

Flash back to the dawn of 2010. Charlie Crist, "the people's governor," is a shoe-in to follow placeholder George LeMieux in the U.S. Senate. Only the upstart former House speaker Marco Rubio doesn't get the message; he surges ahead of Charlie in the polls. Charlie can't believe he isn't beloved by the voters, so he dumps the Republican Party and runs partyless against Marco. Ouch. EPIC loss. End of Chapter 1.

Then in 2014, buoyed by a coast-to-coast "For the People" billboard presence, and doped up by fawning Democrats who have no candidate of their own, Charlie joins the Florida Democratic Party and sets out to hug his way across Florida -- on his hands and knees if he has to, anything to crawl back to the Governor's Mansion he gave up four years earlier.

Ah, well.

His new party pals assure him he can beat unpopular Rick Scott, who isn't much of a hugger and doesn't even have his own fan. But I don't have to tell you, tough-luck Charlie came up short again, lost to Scott by a slim 1.07 percent. 

Fate. The curse of Marco Rubio, his old nemesis. End of Chapter 2.

Speaking of Marco, by this time he has his eyes on the White House and announces he won't run for reelection to the Senate no matter what.

Charlie doesn't bite a second time. He's badly wounded after 2014 and takes a long time at the beach to heal, a long time to fluff up his ego and restore the old twinkle. He passes on running for Marco's seat. But then, redistricting opens a door for Democrats in CD 13 and beneath his dignity though a lowly congressional seat is, Charlie holds his nose and walks through.

Now he figures, I've got an easy, open seat. 

Sooo close to the true love of his life: Washington, D.C., cameras, power, public service, celebrity hobnobs, more cameras -- happy days are here again.

But, oh, no. No, no, no, no -- who surfaces to deja-vu him off his little cloud of happiness?  Yes, his worse nightmare, "Little Marco!"

Wouldn't you know it, the Republicans want Marco back in the Senate. So this week Marco announces he's running for reelection after all. And all of a sudden, Charlie has a real opponent in November. He has incumbent David Jolly.

Jolly had been running for Rubio's Senate seat. Worse, he'd been making a lot of progress, increased his popularity, widened his name recognition, even won time on 60 Minutes promoting a bill that captured voters' imagination.

Now, even though the new CD 13 by the numbers favors a Democrat, in a matter of days after Jolly's back in, Charlie's losing by double digits. Polling from prominent GOP pollsters McLaughlin & Assoc. has Charlie 12 points behind and in a race for his life. AGAIN.

Poor Charlie. A cake walk just turned into a "Pirates of the Caribbean"-style walk off the plank.

All because of Marco Rubio, the man with a knife between his teeth. Charlie's own personal pirate.

What's a guy gotta do?

Reach Nancy Smith at nsmith@sunshinestatenews.com or at 228-282-2423. Twitter: @NancyLBSmith

Comments

Crust=loser

While anything can happen, the numbers and presidential turnout still favor Crist. I trust ppp and st Pete polls over the one showing jolly up 12 points back from June 1st. St Pete polls had a lot of undecided with big pool of them having voted for obama the last time. Even if Jolly gets crossover votes it's likely not enough. Especially since the new voters in the district are African American voters less likely to defect to Jolly. Crist did well with African Americans even as a republican and npa candidate. He did great with them as a democrat, although cnn's exit poll caused some confusion showing scott doing better with them then before (this was wrong per a precinct by precinct analysis.)

Mark and Anonymous, you are both full of bull excrement. Marco is running against Murphy a Daddy takes care of everything little man with absolutely no background voters cannot look at without laughing.

Raoul, who's the daddy? Your point made no sense. Little Marco will never get back to sucking our tax dollars away again, as he was allowed to do the last couple years. Marco is, in my opinion, a thief, liar, sneak, cheat, and all around dirt bag. Hopefully you'll understand that, Raoul. GO TRUMP!!

Never Rubio. Go TRUMP!!

"Old Charlie the Tuna" Crist; Not this time EITHER "Charlie"!!!!!! (If I have to, I'll 'hold my nose' and "pull" for Marco Polio...) BUT, NEVER FOR "The Tuna" ! ! ! (ALL we need is just one more Republican 'choice',...and the "Tuna" and "Polio" can "walk off into the sunset holding hands"....)

NEVER RUBIO!!! Go Trump!!

McLaughlin group, prominent? Hahaha! They're the most laughable, worst polling outfit around. Ask Eric Cantor about their record. Crist will beat Jolly in November without a doubt. Go Charlie!

Remember Jolly's 'folly' ? Never again! Go TRUMP!!

Lets hope little Marco has learned his lesson and won't take his constituents for granted this time around. He does have to endorse the Donald however.

NEVER little Marco. GO TRUMP!!

Rubio may have angered some of his constituents, but the possibility of either of the Democrat alternatives goes far beyond anger. It's called "completing the destruction of America".

Rubio assisted in laying bricks of destruction of America. He's a liar, a cheater, a true politician. NEVER again! GO TRUMP!!

Rubio hasn't won any yet, He pissed off his constituents and that's not to his benefit. Remember how won Florida, it wasn't Rubio it was Donald Trump.

Comments are now closed.

nancy smith
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