There's unrest in the left-wing world of South Florida. Some are so dissatisfied that they want to break away and form their own state.
After the vice mayor of South Miami proposed a resolution to secede and become the 51st state, the mayor boo-hooed that he didn't feel the love from North Florida. Its very apparent that the attitude of the northern part of the state is that they would just love to saw the state in half and just let us float off into the Caribbean," he reportedly huffed.
The South Miami politicians are concerned that the rising seas, which they attribute to climate change, will soon swamp them, and they are upset that the folks in Tallahassee are not as worried about this possibility. Apparently, they missed the news that we now have a president who has promised to top King Canute and still the waters.
The secessionists also were upset that the Yankees in North Florida are farther above sea level than they are, although they stopped short of demanding elevational equality.
The mutinous declaration passed 3-2, with a city commissioner who also is a history teacher warning, "I just want you guys to be careful, because if you vote for this youre setting a precedent that if other people in this city dont like our representation or feel were not responsive to them, they might say we want to break away from the city of South Miami.'"
The resolution calls for peeling off 24 counties and it was careful to include that big money machine, Disney World. Liberals always ensure they have a rich source of funding for their wacky socialist schemes.
It's not a new idea. Four of the existing 50 states (not 57 as el presidente says) were split from other states and from time to time someone in places such as California, Texas, Michigan or Colorado will suggest a breakup. It also has come up in Florida before, notably North Lauderdale in 2008.
Residents of the Florida heartland, north of Interstate 4, probably would not be unhappy to see the liberals form their own perfect union, but there are a few practical problems.
One question is whether the Florida National Guard would have to be called out to stop the rebels from seceding. A state divided against itself cannot stand -- although it might be able to sit comfortably.
An underground railway probably would be formed to smuggle harried conservatives out of the rebel territory.
It is unclear whether the southern politicians cited city's rights in promoting division.
Presumably, however, they would immediately ban all auto traffic and the production of electricity, once they had autonomy. Can't be warming the world up, you know, even if the trees in the Everglades do appreciate the carbon dioxide.
One mutual benefit would be that the rebs could have Charlie Crist/John Morgan as governor, and everything would be harmonious and copacetic in the brave, new state of South Florida.
Lloyd Brown was in the newspaper business nearly 50 years, beginning as a copy boy and retiring as editorial page editor of the Florida Times-Union in Jacksonville. After retirement he served as a policy analyst for Florida Gov. Jeb Bush.
